Walking With A Ghost
by Summersetlights
Summary: When you mix a party at the beach, a couple glasses of beer, and a broken heart, what's the outcome? Eli is soon to find out.


**_Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi._**

**_...The promo is giving me all sorts of inspiration..._**

**_Enjoy? Review?_**

* * *

><p>The taste of cool beer traveled down his sore throat, the cold, icy feeling soothed his burning body.<p>

Eli sighed and threw his head against the back of the chair. The plastic beach chair was green and creaked with every sudden move he made, and because of that he kept still, trying not to draw attention to himself. He closed his bloodshot eyes and raised the plastic cup to his lips. He drank the beer in one swift gulp and licked his lips, sweeping away the remains. The bitter taste settled in his stomach and he let out a big burp, which caused the girl next to him to give him a dirty look and walk away.

He sighed and settled even further into the green, plastic chair, ignoring that it was hard and was impossible to get comfortable in. Eli placed the plastic cup onto the semi-wet sand and hoped that an eco freak didn't see it on the ground. The last thing he needed was to be lectured. Eli let the shouts of the teenagers come in one ear and go out the other, paying no attention to anything. His eyes were focused on the fire burning in front of him, sending sparks into the warm night. Eli watched the sparks disappear and wondered where they went. He squinted eyes and tried to find the stars, and smiled slightly when he saw one wink at him.

He felt like the world was turning on its axis.

Or maybe that was just his stomach.

He couldn't tell.

Eli let out a groan and felt his stomach move slightly, the feeling of being drunk had arrived, and in a way it felt good. He had wondered if he was alive and this was a definite reassurance.

And he snuggled deeper into the creaky chair, not caring that he possibly looked pathetic. Not caring that people were leaving and didn't notice him. Not caring that the fire was going down, falling short of flames.

But he did care that he could smell lavender perfume. He shut his eyes tightly when he heard the chair next to him creak, a sign that someone was sitting in it. It was the lavender perfume and the sound of sudden intake of breath that made Eli shut his eyes tighter.

"Eli?"

No. No. He just wanted her to go away. He didn't want her to see him like this. He didn't want her to see him at his worst, with beer dribbling down his chin, and eyes dead. He wanted her to see him when he had prepared himself to look like he just didn't care. She was ruining everything.

"Eli?" And this time Clare prodded his shoulder lightly, as if he were a delicate leaf, "are you alright?"

Eli knew Clare well enough to know that she wouldn't leave until he answered back, so he licked his lips and opened his mouth to speak, "I'm fine." But his voice worked against him and made him sound sick. He heard Clare hum sympathetically and felt her touch his cheek.

"Do you mind if I stay next to you?" Clare murmured and raked her fingers through his thick black hair. Eli felt a shiver down his spine, and felt his hairs on his neck become erect.

"Don't you have somewhere else to be?" Eli muttered, but not in a mean way, but in the way of not being able to believe that she wanted to stay with him.

"Plenty of places. But I'd rather stay with you." And against Eli's wishes, he felt his lips turn up in pleasure at her words. He opened his eyes, adjusting his eyes to the night. He glanced down at the curly-haired girl and felt himself yearning to touch her, to make sure that she was real. He looked down at her hand in the sand, fingers digging into the grainy soil. Something felt off about her hand, but he couldn't place what. Sure, it looked tanner than usual, but that was normal in the summer. Maybe it was-

The purity ring was gone.

Realization hit Eli like a wave. And this wave had pulled him into the ocean, keeping him hostage, and not letting go. And he was drowning. Drowning and sinking. He couldn't breathe, he couldn't-

"How've you been?" Clare asked, her tone friendly and sweet, breaking Eli's thoughts.

"Been better. How about you?" His voice was thick and slightly bitter. He felt like he was looking at someone completely different. A girl who was a stranger to him but also someone who he'd spent forever with. And he wondered if she felt the same way about him.

"Same. Some days are better than most, though," She said matter-of-factly. She wrapped her arms around her legs and shivered slightly. Eli took his jacket that was laying in the sand next to him and threw it across her shoulders. Clare smiled warmly and snuggled deeper into the jacket. She raised the collar a bit and smelled it, "it smells like you."

Eli smiled and felt a chuckle form in his throat, "Is that a good thing?"

Clare laughed and Eli savored that sound, he loved it so much. "Of course. It reminds me of a simpler time," Clare muttered and looked at the sky, ignoring the beach ball that had zoomed passed her head, "a better time." She added, whispering it as if it were a dirty secret.

He felt his heart squeeze and spin and spaz. It was a better time. It was a simpler time. It was a wonderful time. Because now, Eli was drunk at a beach, talking to a girl that held his heart in her ring-less hand. And without knowing, she was crushing it with each second that passed. Eli sank back into the green chair, not caring that it creaked loudly.

"Hey, Eli?" Clare said suddenly, her voice distant. He glanced down at her and noticed that she was looking at the sky, her eyes twinkling like the stars.

"Yeah?" He spoke softly, in a way that only a lover could.

"Remember that night at Adam's party? When we were in the hammock?" Eli felt his breathing become unsteady and he held onto the chair tightly. Yes. He did remember that night, "I think about that night from time to time, you know? I think about how everything changed. And I wish that it didn't. Because in that night...I'm pretty sure that I saw forever." Clare whispered this and he saw a couple of tears fall down her cheeks.

"I still see it," Eli whispered and Clare glanced back at him, "I've always seen it with you." And his voice shook and broke.

"Oh, Eli, I-"

But before she could finish her sentence, whatever she was going to say, a ball hit Eli smack-dab in the middle of his forehead.

And he jerked awake, sitting straight up, the ball in his lap, and no girl in sight.

He heard the guys behind him yell their apologies and Eli simply threw it back, paying no attention to who was sorry. Eli rubbed his eyes in a hard manner, trying to eliminate the dream that he just had. He shook his head and snuggled back into the green chair, wanting to have that dream again. She had to finish what she was saying. He needed to know the rest of what she was saying.

After a while, Eli sat up in aggravation and gave up the hope of having the dream. He glanced around the beach, noticing Adam with his date. He noticed the new girl-Imogen, was it?-and he turned his attention to the sparklers, watching them buzz and fizz out. And he noticed a cute, familiar girl dancing around with one in her hand. And he felt his body ache because that girl wasn't dancing alone. And she wasn't caring about him, and was focused on the boy in front of her. And her hand was still ring-less. And he knew that the boy would never love her like he did.

He felt bile force its way up his throat, but he swallowed it down, forcing it to go south. Eli shivered and grabbed the jacket on the ground next to him, purposely ignoring the girl that was shining brightly, in a way that only he could see. Eli wrapped his jacket around his shoulders and sank into it. He leaned back, and tried to go back asleep again, but suddenly, his eyes snapped open.

Something smelled like lavender.

Eli looked around, but Clare was still dancing with the boy. His breathing started to get shaky again and he looked around furiously, trying to find the source of the lavender. Eli sighed and bit his lip and sank back into his jacket.

He couldn't help but watch her. She was just so beautiful. And the wind made her dress flow, giving her a free look. Eli felt himself smile when he heard her laugh. It was a bell. It was so pure and lovely. Clare danced in circles, making Eli's heart feel lighter and warm. But then she turned around and looked at the boy who was dancing with her. And she had that look on her face.

She was going to kiss him.

She wanted to conquer another elephant in the room.

Eli knew that look. He cherished it and fell in love with it.

And when Clare and the boy kissed, Eli felt his stomach turn and when the bile forced its way back up, he didn't try to stop it. He didn't try to stop it and he leaned over the edge of the chair and let everything out. And when he was done, he leaned back and wiped his mouth with his hand, and felt another realization dawn on him.

He knew that it was time to forget the girl that had forgot him.

But instead, he reached for another cup of beer and drank it, hoping to see the blue-eyes beauty in dreamland again.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Review? ;)<em>**


End file.
